i enjoy lists. i look at a list and know exactly what needs to be done so i dont have to worry about forgetting papers, appointments, etc. i especially love it when someone gives me a lists to follow. especially when that someone is a wise theologian. here is a list compiled by john piper (i did the little blurbs) on how to keep unity with each other. look at it. think about the areas that you struggle with most. and then do it!
1. let's avoid gossiping
gossiping is the first thing to do if you want to to hurt the unity of a group. not only are you making someone look bad in front of someone else, you are hurting the trust of the person you are speaking to! this is especially true with fellow believers. why do we feel the most freedom to gossip when it's about our own church family?
2. let’s identify evidences of grace in each other and speak them to each other and about each other.
instead of looking at what the person is doing wrong, first focus on where you are seeing God work in them! then TELL THEM. how encouraging is it for someone to hear that God is being shown in their life. I can't say how many times i have felt lame and felt like i was being a dead-beat Christian then someone goes out of their way to encourage it me and i am reminded that God is SO much bigger than me and just because i can't feel him doesn't mean he is not moving!!
3. Let’s speak criticism directly to each other if we feel the need to speak to others about it.
this kind of goes along with the gossip idea. if you find yourself having a major grievance with someone, ask yourself if you have talked to that person about it. if you haven't and have no intention to, do not talk to anyone else about it. if you need advice on the situation before you confront your friend, there are ways to go about it without bashing or gossiping! Talk to one person who is older and outside of the situation. And our motive when bringing another person in is to gain wisdom so there can be restoration. I have been trying to use these situations as a chance to rely on the Spirit to guide me, not any one person. Being an external processor, it's hard for me to not talk to many people about my issues. In reality, the only necessary person to talk to about it is the Lord.
4. Let’s look for, and assume, the best motive in the other’s viewpoint, especially when we disagree.
Believe the best in others. Believe that your fellow Christ followers are not out to get you. When we feel threatened it's easy for us to get defensive. Remember, we are on the same side here! Satan would love for us to be on different sides. We are far less affective that way.
5. Think often of the magnificent things we hold in common.
When you are in a fight or tension with someone else, remember, Christ died for both of you. In front of the cross we are equally helpless. Remembering this can ease the tension and the desire to bash others. You are no greater than the person next to you. Your sin issues are no holier. You are both children of the Most High.
